Read Mark 10:1-12
Please Don’t Get A Divorce.
In this passage, we’re talking about divorce. Jesus is NOT talking about divorce that is justifiable. But rather, Jesus is talking about couples seeking divorce without any Biblical justification. Having said that, let me encourage those marriages that have biblical justification, that there is still hope for reconciliation under the guiding hand of God almighty.
The Pharisees approach Jesus on the issue of divorce to put Jesus to the test. They want to see if people can pursue a divorce that’s not justifiable. For example, a man wants to divorce his wife because she’s a horrible cook and spends too much time at her parents’ house. And the woman wants to divorce her husband because he belches and farts too much while watching sports all the time on TV.
These may be offensive issues in the marriage but are issues that are very capable of being worked through. I want to mention just three principles that we could apply in helping pursue a reconciled marriage.
1. OPEN COMMUNICATION: Open Communication is so important when it comes to dealing with problems in marriage. If only one person is willing to communicate, then it’s hard to reach reconciliation. Each person must swallow their pride and admit they aren’t perfect and deal with the issues at hand. Work through them.
2. DIE TO SELF: Dying to Self is not easy but it can do a lot to save a marriage. It’s not an act of weakness but actually an act of love and great strength. Dying to self means getting rid of pride, selfishness, and striving towards unity. It’s recognizing your spouse’s needs and desires and then being willing to put them above your own. Dying to self can make forgiveness so much easier. It can enhance one’s intimacy with one another because dying to self is an act of humility and love for another. It’s an attractive feature. Who wouldn’t want to spend more time with someone who truly dies to self and exalts the needs of their spouse? Who wouldn’t want to be more intimate with them?
3. LOVE AND SERVE ONE ANOTHER. Be more conscious to love and serve your spouse even when it requires sacrifice and humility. This is what Jesus demonstrated for us so we should be willing to demonstrate that for our spouse.
In verses 6-8, Jesus says that at the beginning of creation God made male and female and when they get married, they were to leave the dependency they had on their parents and become one with each other. They are no longer two separate individuals but one in the eyes of God. And if you are one then you should stay one and nothing should separate the two. Jesus even goes as far as to say that if one divorces their spouse with no Biblical justification, and then remarries someone else, they commit adultery before God. I don’t say this as a way of condemning a person but as a way of motivating one to save your marriage.
Let’s all be willing to acknowledge that there are temptations to leave one’s spouse with no Biblical basis. Let this act as a motivation to work on the marriage versus being quick to take the easy route and leave. You fought to capture your spouse when dating, let’s take that same energy and fight to save it. Use communication, die to self, and be more conscious to humbly love and serve your spouse.
